You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
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