I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
