Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
