But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
