Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize
