I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Randomize
