My brain says no but my pants say off.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
