hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
