Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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