i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Randomize
