hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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