He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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