Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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