My hand turned me down
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
How's work?
Spinning.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
