tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize