I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
