He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize