She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
