xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
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