I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize