i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
