Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
