Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
