Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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