the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
