I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
