it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
false alarm, still single
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
