dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
