You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Randomize