You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
