Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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