My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
