i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
