He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Randomize