Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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