Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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