I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
