do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
