Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Randomize