he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
She's not a foreskin expert like you
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize