Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Randomize