so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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