is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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