you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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