K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Randomize
