i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
