Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
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