Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Just pee around me
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
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