this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
He? As in you personified your dick?
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I made him laugh his dick is mine
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
