he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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