just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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